You Are For Me

This song   by Kari Jobe has blessed me today.  While waiting for David to get back from his trip I have sat on my sofa with my arms around both of my girls and just teared up.  I've wept because I KNOW these words to be true- and for that I'm thankful.  It's been another difficult week, but David and I feel like even though we've been waiting to hear back from doctors and insurance it's been a productive week.  God continues to take us down a path of reading, researching, calling, emailing, confirming, opening/closing doors, and putting some puzzle pieces together AT THE SAME TIME continually working on our hearts in the midst of this huge process.  In fact, when David got home we were listening to the song again and again. We all four sat and stared at the computer screen in silence listening to these beautiful words.  Nobody told anyone to sit and listen.  We just did.   One of those moments I just sensed His presence.  I wonder what the other three were thinking?  I didn't dare ask at the time.  It was kind of holy moment, if you will.   For me, it was reassurance.  It was comfort.  It was hope in which I've been asking.  I was sharing with a lady this week that this year has not only been a year of physical pain but of emotional pain- gut wrenching, heart breaking....just downright painful in so many ways.  We both talked about "that all things work together for the good for those who love Him."  So very, very true.

Yesterday, I saw some small improvements. So I give Him praise.  I praise Him that we had some resolve on insurance issues this week (still have a ways to go!).  I praise Him because I was able to go to my small group study which was such a blessing to me.  I praise Him because the sun came out a couple of days...so you KNOW that made me a happy camper!  I praise Him that I was able to walk down the street to take the girls to get an ice cream on Friday.   Goodness, I praise Him that I was able to get out of bed and actually get dressed a couple of days this week!   I praise Him that my sores on my knuckles have almost closed up and the redness on my chest and hands are some better today.  Maybe I'm beginning to see the work of the antibiotics.  I know I still have a very long road ahead of me toward physical healing and quite frankly, that can get overwhelming at times, but the words of that song so completely met me where I was today...."You are for me...I know you will never forsake me in my WEAKNESS."

We still covet your prayers in major family decisions and that we will come out on the other side of all this stronger.  In my James study for the new week I was asked some pointed questions.  Sometimes I don't like those kind of questions, but last night I did.  I sat and wrote out some very honest answers.  Even though there's pain, I know God is at work and He has my best interest at heart.  Man, it's not a fun place to be, but He's GOT to have something for me to learn from all of this....just hope I'll learn my lesson!

"I know that you are for me. "I know that you will never forsake me in my weakness..."

"so faithful. so constant..."

"so powerful in all You do...."

"to remind me who you are..."

okay, I really should go to bed now...but back to listen to my song :-)