Guest blogger...and doesn't know it!

Christmas Eve service!

after Christmas Ever service...

Mom said it well in our nightly email on Saturday...
------------------------------------
Girls fed, bathed, hair washed, finger polish removed, fingers painted, teeth brushed, clothes picked out for church tomorrow, now asleep....all is well!!!!!!

Christmas dinner fixings purchased,
Possible way to solve Abigail's eye glasses crisis,

Bible study group provided our lunch for tomorrow with leftovers from their Christmas party,

I was blessed to get to play for Audrey An's caroling,

Blessed to see AA sing with the caroling group,

We were all blessed that they came to rehab to see you,

Blessed to have afternoon with my daughter,

Blessed that my daughter had a better day,

Blessed to have fun and spend time with precious granddaughters!

WOW......ALL IS WELL!!!!!!!!!!

nite nite
Love you,
Mom

Making new friends

I made the transfer to the in-patient rehab Tuesday night. I have to be honest, I was glad to be discharged from the hospital but concerned my CPK was way higher upon discharge than David and I preferred. Monday nite it registered  at 7000 and some other labs were elevated. They redid those tests because it seemed to be a false reading. Sure enough, after taking CPK again a few hours later it was 5000. Still not stellar at all but better than 7000. The rheumatologist still holds to the belief of not getting caught up on the number but more in how I feel. Well, I felt YUCKY on Tuesday  so I didn't think I'd be going anywhere!  He feels this is a better placement in order to receive intense PT and OT.  It's wiping me out! My muscles are so weak and so inflamed the littlest bit of exertion is doing me in....but I will press on!  No pain, no gain, right?!

The facility is nice. The staff is very kind. I'm 1 Iof only 9 patients so they are attentive- all huge praises!  It's a tad humbling to be here. Of course, it's not a circumstance I ever dreamed I'd be in, but I'm meeting new friends in the "gym" and had a lunch date with my new friend, Bonnie.  Man,
everyone has a story, and of course, being in a place like this at age 41 was not in my big picture plan, but I'm enjoying reflecting on my blessings and trying to make the best of it. I confess I had a "moment" this morning- soooo missing my girls and hubby, discouraged by my weakness and inability to do normal life, but after a few tears The Lord reminded me to be strong in The Lord and that He hasn't forsaken me!

Tuesday Transfer

Barring nothing bizarro happening through the night or tomorrow the rheumatologist is recommending my discharge here and be transferred to an in-patient rehab facility for 1-2 weeks (Merry Christmas to me ?!). He thinks now this is a better placement for me since the first IVIG treatment is complete and my focus now needs to be on strengthening my very weakened muscles. I'm a bit disappointed that CPK is not lower than it is, but he doesn't want me to get caught up on the number ( kinda hard to do when I've tracked it for 22 months!).  I look forward to seeing what it is after my midnight blood test though!  He's willing to dismiss me since my swallowing has improved (that's another story!).  Difficulty in swallowing and pneumonia are two huge risk factors with this disease- so that's obviously a point of prayer as well.

Okay, well more to come from my happy rehab place!!!  THANK YOU for continued prayers!  Our family has been so blessed by the prayers of the faithful, an anonymous donation today as well as  learning that my rehab is going to be covered this afternoon. God is good! Oh, and did I mention the rehab facility is about 15 minutes from my house-yay!  That wil make it so much more convenient for David and my parents. Yes, Santa's sleigh (mom and dad...yay!) srrived (again!) and Santa Elf  ( Debra) flew back this morning...sniff sniff!).  How grateful I am for the "village"!

Monday update

I've now completed my "first" three day IVIG treatment.   Side effects were minimal...slight headache Saturday-Sunday. My CPK rose each day though- Saturday was 3411, Sunday was 3600 and this morning it's 3924. Although I've have already met the team of internists and rheumatology fellow, I will see the rheumatologist later today. It doesn't look like I will be moving to rehab today due to pending official insurance approval/red tape and just the fact my CPK is still high.  Honestly, David and I don't want to be transferred until we see even more of a decrease in CPK.

When I asked if I have permanent muscle damage I was told if there's damage it can' be reversed (continual high CPK).  I told her, "Ha!!! Oh no, I'm going to have a better, new and improved body than ever before. You must watch. I'm praying for my miracle, and I'm going to get it!!!". She just grinned a said, "Well, I hope so. We think you have a good chance of improving and at least getting back to almost where you were."  Again, "Hahahaha!"  I 'm sorry, but MY GOD is wayyyyy more powerful than any these doctors, any of these medicines, and any of man's wisdom!!

Oh, I wish I could post pics from PT/OT. On Saturday, I looked like a marionette puppet!  They had me hooked up to this contraption to work my deltoids, and I looked quite hysterical!  AA thought the rehab gym was pretty nifty and did her own e exercises while waiting on me.  If you saw me doing these exercises you'd probably wonder how any of those simple exercise/stretches could possibly be helping me, but I'm having to start at the basics to increase my strength.  I've been very please with all the therapist and docs (except for one doc who's a bit too big for his britches....ahem).

On a bit more fun note... The girls sang in their Christmas program last night at our church. Of course, I was sad I couldn't be there, but my friend Michelle patched me in via FaceTime....super cool! S, I was kinda there!! So thrilled David and my sister could be there for them.  Debra flew out
this morning, and mom and dad are arriving this afternoon after a two day drive out here.

Claiming these these promises today...(thanks, mom, for sending!)
"The Lord is near to all who call on Him, to all who call on Him in truth.  He hears their cry and saves them."  Psalm 145:18-19

"I will lift my eyes to the hills, where does my help come from?  My help,comes from The Lord, the Maker of of heaven and earth."  Psalm 121:1-2

"Cast all your cares cares on Him because He cares for [me]!" 1Peter 5:7

Aunt Debs is a great auntie!

First day of IVIG!

Praises!
*Friday CPK down to 3700!
*Yay for ambien- had a pretty good night's sleep last nite!
*Started IVIG treatment today and had no bad side effects!
*OT evaluation and swallow tests completed today!
*Mom and dad are driving out to help again....wow!
*FaceTime with my baby girl since I didn't get to see them today...love technology!
*Both girls had parties tonight...thankful for diversions for them!
*My sister being her here for moral support, help,with girls and finished my ChristmasYou are for Me shopping...yay for sister elf!
*Brothers-in-law who are quite capable of parenting their kiddoes while their wives (and themselves) graciously offered to come out to help,us when they have families of their own and extremely lives!!!
*Debs will still be here to be the girls' mommy figure at the their Christmas program on Sunday!
*God's provision with David's work schedule!

If all goes well with the treatment and my strength improves by end of this round of IVIG (completed on Sunday) they plan to discharge me on Monday and be immediately transferred to an in-patient rehab facility.  David and Debra visited this hospital's rehab this afternoon and will visit one on Saturday that's about 10 minutes from our house!  I'm praying that the one closest to home will be a good fit because it will much more convenient for family.

Thought I'd share a few of my theme songs. I think I've posted them before over the past two years, but it seems they've been on my constant play list this week while staring at these four walls. Kari Jobe is one of my favorite worship leaders. The words in her songs are powerful and her voice is beautiful. Hope they encourage you, too.  Healer, Beautiful, The More I Seek You , You are for Me  some of my favorites of hers.  While I'm Waiting is another one that has special meaning to me for prior to my illness but certainly applies now as well. If you get an email update because you subscribe to my blog and the links to the songs don't pop up (sometimes that happens!), then just link to the actual blog and you can listen to these songs!

Huge praise!

Today, proved to be another exhausting day due to lack of sleep, PT evaluation and exercise, and speech therapy (yes, I can talk!  She's working with me on my swallowing difficulties- will have swallow study done on Friday).  This afternoon David and I received the confirmation we were praying for in regards to the IVIG treatment.  We received word from the rheumatologist that our insurance approved the treatment, and moments after that I received an email from Dr. M that I should go with the rheumatologist's recommendation with this treatment! So we are going for it!

So tomorrow I will begin the first three day infusion treatment of the IVIG. It will take about eight hours each day. They are also changing the delivery of my steroid so hopefully that will aid in better sleep...instead of every six hours of the IV I'm going to take the loading dose orally first thing in the morning...PLUS they agreed to give some good sleep aid tonight. Yay!  Oh!! Another praise is that CPK continues to decrease.  It  measure 4590 today.  It's basically been cut in 1/2  in three days with the increased steroid (which to my pleasing hasn't been anywhere on the scale of the amount given in Bangkok which is great!) and a constant saline drip which is flushing me out and helping reduce my inflammation.

Pray that this new treatment will prove success and God will use this in my miracle healing!  Pray that my body will respond to it quickly and with NO negative side effects.  The rheumatologist says if after three months (that's one treatment per month) we don't see improvement there would be no reason to continue it.  We are believing and asking God's favor in this!!!

If I were real smart I'd know how to upload my sweet visitors I had tonight from my phone onto my iPad, but.... Not sure how to do that!  Lets just say I had two cutie patooties overtake my hospital bed and their momma some good snuggles!!!

"The Lord is near to all who call on Him, to all who call on Him in truth.  He hears their cry and saves them."  Psalm 145:18-19

Wednesday update

Well, I had bit more action today here on the hospital front than yesterday. Unfortunately, I had another rough night as far sleep goes though.  You know this insomniac can't function with multiple days of no sleep.  I did have about two hours so I'm grateful for that since I had none on Monday night.   I had a team meeting this morning with a group of internists, my day nurse, social worker, etc. I had a speech evaluation due to my difficulty swallowing.  My sister arrived from Texas on a flight this morning and happened to get to the hospital while I was having my speech evaluation completed.  Debra is a speech therapist as well so they got to converse as well. I then met with the rheumatologist again.  We discussed the possibility of the IVIG treatment some more.  The team has put a call into Dr. M's office to discuss my situation, and I have a contacted her as well to get opinion on this treatment option.

David and my prayer is that God would give us His wisdom, peace and confirmation from The Lord if this is the direction we are suppose to go.  This treatment is basically a protein plasma replacement.  One treatment is over several days and takes about 6-7 hours of IV infusion.  The rheumy says if after three months of treatment we don't see improvement then it wouldn't be worth continuing.  It has to be pre approved by insurance since its not your normal, everyday treatment.  It very costly so we are praying no issues with approval from insurance.

On a positive note my muscle weakness has improved a very tiny bit today with IV steroid infusions every six hours since 6pm last night (not good for sleep to have a steady of the 'roid, but it shooting down my CPK now to around 5000 (ER admittance was around 8200).. So we are headed in the right direction.  Praise God!

The OT and PT evaluations and neurology consult did not happen again today...bummer. Hoping those take place tomorrow.  David and Debra did their own PT with me...I walked down the hallway dragging my IV pole while they were very close by. You know...I'm a "fall risk"!!! Lol (inside joke!!). David said my legs were stronger because he didn't have to pull on my as hard to get me up from a sitting position. We will take teeny improvements any day!!

Loved these verses today..,
"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God.  I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.". Isaiah 41:10

"Even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast." Psalm 139:10

THANK YOU for all the prayers, texts, prayer pages, calls, emails, carpool help, visits, and Facebook messages.  It  encourages my heart, and I know God hears our prayers!!!!!

Admit it...

 First thing Monday morning I had another appointment with the nurse practitioner at Dr.  M's office. I told her my condition continued to worsen over the weekend and they nor I had heard back from two separate neurologists. She recommended I go to the ER at one of our leading research/teaching hospitals to get my foot in the door quicker to see a neurologist. That was confirmation enough for me as this was also suggested by a sweet friend of mine last Friday, but we didn't want to go on the weekend thinking we might not see the specific doc who was being recommended.  So. We hopped in the car, dropped off David's sister at the airport (Deborah flew in to help us last thursday-monday!) and made our way to the ER. Although we arrived about 1pm and got checked in quickly and some prelim tests were completed, david, my sweet friend Michelle who volunteered to hang with us, and I hung out in the ER hallway until about 9pm....long day, but Michelle kept us company and gave us some much needed company and laughter!! AND it was her wedding anniversary!!! How romantic to be hanging with friends in the ER on your anniversary-ha!!!  

So, this is my second night here and struggling to sleep and finally got my phone to let me post. Yesterday was fairly uneventful. Had an echo done on my heart due to a cardiac enzyme that was elevated. All is well with my heart- nothing in which to be concerned. Met with the attending rheumatologist who spent over an hour with me. It took that long for me to debrief him all the details of my initial diagnoses, treatment if 22months, answer tons of questions, examine me, and begin to discuss a game plan. While I was in the ER Monday had an iv steroid- not the huge dosage I had in Bangkok but it began to bring my CPK down. He is continuing iv steroid which I'm getting every six hours. His goal is to get me back around 1000 CPK prior to discharge which will be quite a reduction from 8200 when I was admitted. We also discussed "options". One being a treatment called IVIG. To be quite honest, David have read a little about it, but have always dismissed because it's VERY expensive and not quarantined to work. Theirs rheumy thought it might be a good option for me sense I continue to flare and gave tried several standard and nonstandard treatments. So, we will discuss and research more-especially with insurance and side effects. The last topic of conversation was possible in-patient rehab after discharge here due to the severity of my disability now. I'm not even sure at this point I'm strong enough to fo rehab since I've got mini. Yes, that's correct. Mono on top of everything else. So that's giving me a triple whammy, too!
Lots to pray about and issues to work out. One of prayers for today is that the team here will consult with Dr. M's office plus I'll be seen by a neurologist today. 

My sister flies here in a few hours and so grateful for David and my sisters willingness to be here to help out!

To be continued....

Patience...oh, give me some

After three solid days with a cumulative of about 18 hours at Dr. M's office this week it landed me visits with med students, one doc, one nurse practitioner, about seven different techs, a home healthcare asseessment, a sonogram, eight vials of blood, cold laser treatments on my back, jaw, neck and thighs and some new lab results.  Of those results I learned my CPK has again risen to 7948, have contracted two more bacterial infections PLUS mono.  Wow... am I a healthy chic or what!?!

Although its been one of my hardest weeks physically my blessings have been overflowing!  David had to leave on a four day trip, and God just went before us and totally took care of me!  Listen to all of my praises!
*friend spent night with me on Monday!
*meals were brought from four different friends!
*two friends came to clean my house!
*friend came and did laundry and even gave me a pedicure!
*five different friends got me to doctor appointments and girls to/from school!
*homeschool group from our church surprised me on Wednesday and raked tons of leaves and blew off our roof and gutters!
*after a very reluctant appointment with the nurse practitioner on Monday and Tuesday (because I didn't want to hash out my very complictEd case with someone new...ugh!)...it ended up being SUCH a blessing because she asked if she could pray for me and is the one who discovered I have mono!
*friend surprised me with taking pics of the girls and printed Christmas cards for us!
*my neighbor was home when I called to rescue me from not being able to get out of my chair...lol!
*home healthcare assessment completed and will start net week!
*Deborah, my sis-n-law, flew out on Thursday nite for a long weekend to help out!
*friend stopped by doc's office for a word of encouragement and prayer!
*located a hospital bed and it was delivered by three men in out church!
*Audrey An decorated my new room with Christmas ornaments!

Prayer requests:
*continued wisdom and insight for Dr. M and team as well as direction for any needed referrals and if/when I should go stay with my parents
*body would not digress anymore...need increased muscle strength!
*God's protection of our entire family- spiritually, physically, mentally
*insurance coverage of home health and equipment needed
*stay focused on God's blessings and not the difficult circumstances...patience :-)

David and his little sis, Deborah!  THANKS for ALL you have done to help out this weekend!

Where do we go from here?

In all things give thanks!

Blogger slacker again...sorry.  Lots been going on since last post so let me get everyone back up to speed.  Mom and and Dad flew out to help and stayed for two weeks.  I truly couldn't have made it without them with David flying. I was a week delayed getting all my amalgams removed due to dentist having an emergency.  I think that was a blessing that we had to break up the time.  It about sent me over the edge for him to work on me- sore jaw and weak neck don't make for a very comfortable dental visit. My condition has worsened, and we are all quite puzzled to say the least.  I'm not able to drive, prepare meals, or open my water bottle without help.  We've had to move to the downstairs guest room due to me not able to conquer the stairs at this point.  I'm thankful for some medical equipment I've been able to borrow from a church friend and am currently on the hunt for a hospital bed since I can't pull myself up from bed when David's out of town.  You know you are getting old when you get excited about an elevated potty chair!!!

I'm glad mom and dad got to meet Dr. M.  They were here for two appointments and had the pleasure of experiencing a six hour visit accompanied by the infusion room and shutting down the office..literally.  Got me some keeper parents, ya know!  That day we found out my CPK had risen to 6640 (way higher than when we left Vietnam and about 1500 below when I was first diagnosed 21 months ago)..  I've had CPK taken again plus some other tests and hope to get those results back at my Monday appointment.

David and I are in the middle of having to make some more decisions...again.  What's our next step?  What do we do?  Do we go to another doctor or clinic? Do I go live with my parents for awhile since I have a traveling husband?  What do we do with the girls' schooling if that happens?  Can we make it work until at least Christmas break then get to Texas? Do we continue to wait this out here?  God, please give us your wisdom. We know you already have the answers.

Praises!
*Celebrated thanksgiving with David early due to him working in "the" day!
*Sweet daughters and mom who got out all my pretties for thanksgiving dinner!
*Friends providing meals!
*Friend coming to stay with me overnight this week!
*Friends coming on Wednesday to clean our house and a back up lady after that!
*Loving husband who's juggling lots of life right now and loving me through this!
*Prayer pager ministry through my church...who would have a little beep letting me know I've just been prayed for would encourage my heart so!
*David, the girls and my dad finding us a new Christmas tree!
*Biblical counselor who called to check on me because I wasn't able to get to my appointment!
*Texts and emails from friends and family!
*Online sermons and music!
*Elevated potty chair!
*Mom who sends me scripture  daily!
*Dad who spends his day researching and shopping for me an electric chair thingy-ma-jig!
*Prayer groups from all over lifting up not only me but my entire family!
*Picnic by the lake with my husband... Beautiful Fall weather!
*God's provision through David's schedule this week when mom and dad had to leave!
*Friend going to the farmers market for me...really trying to change my diet and eats tons of anti inflammatory foods!
*Redbox movies!
*God's promises and patience towards me!
*Doctor who is a detective!

Grandparents Day at school unexpected blessing!

Abigail's first band concert!

Calling All Prayer Warriors

I would so covet your prayers this week.  Tuesday I will be going back to the dentist to have the remaining amalgam fillings removed from my mouth.  As I've stated before, my doctor thinks bacterial infection stemming from cracked and old silver fillings is greatly contributing to my illness.

Specifically, pray that no metals would get into my bloodstream and the dentist would get all material out and infection in mouth would heal completely ASAP.  When this procedure is complete David and I will have done everything possible environmentally in order for me to get well (mold remediation of the basement and teeth). 

My parents will be coming again from Texas to help, but my mom is in poor health herself so please pray for her healing as well.  Lastly, please continue to pray for David and the girls. The tarrying of this illness is really taking a toll on the entire family.  Physically, I'm back to where I was when we decided to move on back to the States...not good.  I've had a change in medication which has made me very nauseated this week.  I've been in bed for a week due to that and the muscle weakness.  I kinda would like to see the outside world!

Praises!
*David and I met with our pastor last week for prayer.  8 more people in church leadership met with us in his office and gathered for prayer...it was such a blessing!

*I had three different families help get the girls to/from church for me on Sunday!

*A friend volunteered to come clean my house this Wednesday!

*Abigail had an unexpected sleepover with a friend Friday night and AA had a friend over Saturday night...blessing for them and me!!

*Friend brought over dinner Friday nite unexpectedly!

*My parents have graciously agreed to drop everything and fly back out here to help us...can't wait!

A little mommy/daughter bonding

I won't share everything, but 6 hours together at Dr. M's office and 3 of those hours included sitting next to each other with our IV poles is some of the "togetherness" we shared today. We both had follow up appointments for Friday, but I called and begged for them to take us this morning since Abigail had a horrible sore throat since Saturday night and I could barely get out of bed this weekend due to muscle weakness and muscle aches (hadn't had the ache since I first got sick). Dr. M feels inflammation again on one said of my jaw and feels "100%" certain that I still have a major bacterial infection coming from my mouth so off to the dentist I go again.  I'll be returning to my new dentist on Thursday in order for him to check out more inflammation and consult with him about the removal of even more silver fillings.  Dr. M is recommending ALL my silver fillings come out.  She assumed they were all taken out a couple of months ago, but she assumed wrong and apologized and apologized.  The metal in my body is causing a problem with the absorption of my meds and foods.  She keeps telling me that my case is complicated and we've not hit that "one" specific thing to zap this illness...but we're getting there.  There are too many layers of the onion to peel back...but we're getting there.  She promises.  I'm holding her to it :-)

Not the ideal bonding experience, but at least we were together!  I think she kinda liked missing school, eating granola bars and drinking juice boxes while cuddled up with a furry blanket and fluffy pillows!

Abs getting "juiced" up for the first time.

The remediation on our basement is almost complete and has been quite a process!  It almost makes me sick (more sick!) just looking at what all they've pulled out of there.  I'm sure our home is the cleanest and most mold free home on the block just about now!  I'm grateful for all their hard work, but I certainly wouldn't want to do that job everyday...uggh.  So...I'm hoping with the completion of the remediation and when the whole dentist thing gets resolved I'm going to see significant improvement. And, of course...lots of prayer!  If not...we'll, well, we'll go from there.

One of our martian men...

Well, it used to be a finished basement

We hang our workers out back when they finish for the day ;-)

Praises!
*Abigail started feeling better immediately after her infusion!
*I started feeling better fairly quickly after my infusion (and I don't normally)!
*My neighbors brought us dinner last night and did some grocery shopping for me last night to tide me over until my man gets home!
*Thankful for my lunch bunch buddy...you know who you are- she's kept my sane lately!
* We're celebrating both girls spiritual birthdays this week!  Abigail is 6 and Audrey An is 2!
* Audrey An continues to bless me with her sweet little prayer life and excitement for the Lord.  She asked her teacher today with MUCH excitement if she could tell her class on Thursday that is was her spiritual birthday.  She prayed this week for God to "heal mommy and Abby because I know you can!" and "thank you, Jesus for giving me just the right mommy and just the right daddy.  Please help me know one day why my birth mommy left me on the side of the road." ugggggggh....deep, but gives me SUCH insight into her heart!

Early celebration of the girls' spiritual birthday when Nana and Papa D were here last week.  mom made her famous angel food cake (the cake I had EVERY year growing up on my birthday!)

Should have added these in last post...oh well.  Abigail after her winning serve!

Abigail with sweet friends at Dannah Gresh's Pure Freedom conference at our church.

It was fun to meet Dannah Gresh after Abigail and I read her book, Secret Keeper Girl!

Trunk or Treat meets Audrey An...the ballerina, gymnast, cowgirl with really big earmuffs because we thought it was going to be really cold outside girl!

Abigail wins the prize for most creative...she's a....SIXTH GRADER!

Things that make you go hmmmmm....

Ok, Ok, Ok...I've been a blog slacker this month.  Sorry!  I'm at a point again of perlexion (is that a word?? Yep, I say it is) so I've been a bit tongue tied lately (or maybe I should say thought-tied). Let me start with praises.  There are some, right?
*Abigail's volleyball team won their first game two weeks ago, and she scored the winning point with her serve!  Yes, her SERVE!  How cool it was for our family to celebrate God choosing to allow my Abigail to be in the right place at the right time and at the right rotation.  All those months of prayers for us just asking God to help her get a server over the net and He sees fit to reward her with the winning serve...the only game the team won all season long!
*I'm breathing...
*Abigail is feeling some better.
*My parents have been here since Friday and have helped me tremendously.
*I'm breathing ;-)
*David has a job.
*The girls are doing great in school.
*I've been encouraged tremendously via on-line sermons this month (I think I've listened to probably 40+!)
*Guest bathroom is almost complete (had it in enough working order while mom and dad have been here!)
*Finally got to meet a neighbor the girls and I've been praying for for several months.
*Did I mention that I can breathe?
*My itching has subsided thanks to a recommendation from my retired pharmaceutical sales dad!

Okay, so here I am.  My CPK has surged back up to a whopping 2996....uggh.  No wonder I can't pull the covers over me in bed or get up and down with ease from a chair anymore.  I'm back to having David getting me out of the tub, the girls helping me with my hair and dressing, and not having enough strength to lift my dinner plate.  Humbling.

Due to my doctor now thinking my issues are environmental she suggested a mold evaluation be done of our home. Two companies came out...one didn't know what they were doing and the other is starting a remediation of our basement today.  Dr. M says I do have some classic signs of being highly sensitive to mold.  I told her, "But I didn't get sick here in the states."  Well, then I told her come to think of it Vietnam was way more humid than where I live now, and we could even see mold on our walls there."  Thankfully, the mold here is contained in the basement (well, visibly...of course, nothing is ever totally contained.  but the visible mold is only in the basement).  This makes some sense to me.  It was when David cracked into our guest bath for remodel that I started itching so severely, and my other symptoms began to increase.  Hmmmm.  Sometimes I feel like we're chasing rabbits, but then at other times I have to continue to acknowledge that I've had quicker progress with Dr. M's treatment than any other.

I still know that my God could heal me in the blink of an eye but is choosing not to for some reason- there's got to be a greater purpose.  His timing is definitely not my timing as far as this goes...just sayin'.  I'll be honest.  If you've been a regular reader, you've seen my oh-so-ups-and-downs of emotions in this.  I'm weary.  I have to fight HARD to keep my emotions in check.  I feel guilt at times.  I'm mad at times.  I'm peaceful at times.  I'm thankful at times.  I'm frustrated and want to punch out a window at times (and, ummmm, yes, I've thrown a couple of remote controls in the last two years but don't tell anyone!). I'm content at times.  I doubt at times.  I've got great hope at times.  I'm a total schizoid at times...ask anyone in my family!  There are so many things in which I'm thankful so I feel guilty when I'm down and out...but I can't hide it...I'm down and out right now.  It will get better.  My prayer right now that God will just restore joy and peace in my heart right now so I can deal with life.  Complete healing on this side of heaven may not be in the plan so I've got to come to a point of contentment on this roller coaster ride of health.

My little punkins...

Mom and I at Audrey Ans' GA brunch at church

My dad power washed our driveway and sidewalks on Saturday, mopped my floors, cleaned all our bathrooms, emptied/loaded my dishwahser everyday, took Abigail on a date while mom and I were at the brunch with AA.  What a guy!  So thankful for helpful parents!!

Busy Beavers

Thank you to all who remembered Audrey An in your prayers last week.  She had a GREAT first week in her new class with what seems to have been a pretty flawless transition!  God really did go before her and protect her heart.  The principal and teachers were really great and welcomed her with open arms.  She says she still misses her second grade friends, but I think she sees them fairly often in the hallway and coming and going from lunch- she can grab some hugs then!  She even told me last Monday night (nite before she started her new class) that she thought God had answered her prayers because her heart was better about it all!

First time skating as a family (well, minus mom)...isn't that a nifty contraption for new skaters!

The girls and I got to spend a long weekend during Fall Break with Kristina...the kids filled their time with swimming, going to the zoo, playing spies and school!

Abigail's first time to sing with the "youth" of our church...second to top row on end left.

David was in town for one of Ab's volleyball games and was a line judge.  Abs is at the net. 

Guest bath remodel is coming along.  Floors, drywall, tub and potty are in (after purchasing and installing THREE toilets!).  This project has proven to be probably the most frustrating for David to date, bless his heart. I hope it's finished by the time my parents come for a visit in a few weeks!!!!

Medical updates:
Abigail- We had her follow up appointment last Friday and received all her test results back.  I don't know if you remember, but last summer she was pretty sick and diagnosed with mono.  When we moved back her pediatrician (and now Dr. M) did not agree with that diagnosis.  Her tests came back as low in certain vitamins and high in three other tests (one that is congruent with a parasite and others that show a high count in white blood cells).  Poor baby!  No wonder she's very fatigued and hasn't felt well.  Now she's being treated for all of it and hopefully we'll see an improvement soon.

Me-  can we say ITCH!?!?!  That's what's been happening to me for about 6 weeks now and I really think I'm going to crawl out of my skin!  I can't find anything to relieve it...benadryl, claritin, Rx, baths in apple cider vinegar and even coat my skin in castor oil!

Praises!
*The first Sunday of  the month those in our Sunday School class who want to come early pray before class starts.  We take our girls and have been for about 5-6 years now.  Neither one has ever prayed out loud in front of the group (mostly adults), but it's something we've encouraged (not pushed) them to do.  After all, lots of adults feel uncomfortable praying out loud (myself included at times).  If God can teach them at a young age that it's about just talking to Him and not pleasing anyone else they'll be a lot better off!  On the way to church yesterday Audrey An says from the back seat of the car, "You know what?  God encouraged me last night that I should pray this morning out loud with our group." Well, indeed she did, AND her big sister went right after her! Wow...so awesome!

*Last night the girls and I read a devotional together and it was about a little boy who received Christ during Vacation Bible School then went home and told his parents and then they received Christ.  Audrey An didn't even let me finish my sentence and said, "Mommy!  Wouldn't it be SO COOL if we went back to China one day and I could tell MY family about Jesus!"  Awwww...I love her love for the Lord, her passion and compassion and how God is working in her little life!

Prayer requests:
*Please pray for total health restoration for Abigail and myself.  Pray that I can keep my eyes focused on things above and not let discouragement drag me down.  Pray for wisdom for Dr. M, David and myself as we work together to find answers/root cause to this yucky illness (specifically this week that I can find relief from the itching!).

Hard Choices

Uggh!  David and I had to make a very difficult decision this past week and are asking for prayers for our little girl.  We decided to place Audrey An back into first grade.  Honestly, we thought we had made the right decision by placing her into second grade, but she's just really struggling.  It's just going to get more difficult for her, and she simply hasn't "caught up" yet. Geeeez Louise, she's only been with us a little over three years and has done AMAZINGLY well.  Goodness, anyone who knows her knows she can talk your ear off, but her reading skills just need a little more time to develop in order to really excel in school.

I broke the news to her last night, and she was NOT a happy camper-oh my!  I truly have not seen her this upset since the day we received her in China!  She was weeping, bless her heart.  I could hardly stand it.  No, I could not stand it.  It ripped my heart out!  This is one of those choices we had to make knowing that it's going to be painful for her short term, but it's going to be the right choice long term.  It was a hard choice because her best little buddy is in her class, and we love her second grade teacher.  I could really kick myself for adding to her grief and causing yet another change in her life.  All along I felt in my heart she would need to repeat kindergarten or first grade, but she did "ok" on her testing when we returned from Vietnam so David and I thought she'd be okay.  Well, lesson learned.  Go with your gut...that's the Holy Spirit prompting (if you've prayed about it).  I shard with her teacher last week that when we first got AA she sleep walked a few times.  She started doing that again recently.  I don't know much about sleep walking, but what little I've read one of the causes can be stress.  It only makes sense in her case- especially given the timeframe/situation she was each time.  A little one doesn't need to struggle like she is with school when we can do something about it.  Praise the Lord we are in a school who is supports our decision and is working with us to set her up for success.

Thankfully, Audrey An is an amazingly resilient little girl.  She's had a LOT of change in her 7 1/2 years of living...and a lot of that has taken place in the past 3 years since she came into our family.  Please pray that God would just swoop her up into His arms and give her a peace with this transition.  Pray that she'll make a new friend quickly this week (she starts her new class tomorrow) and her new teacher will be the perfect match for the remainder of this school year.  Pray that this placement will help her solidify all these basic skills (especially reading) and she will know success in these areas.  Pray that she will see God work POWERFULLY in her life and through this situation!

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28

On a lighter note... I am happy to report that Abigail scored SIX points (all from her serves!) in her last volleyball game!  I love it when  our girls see very tangible answers to their prayers, and I am expecting the same greatness and faithfulness this week with Audrey An!

Tweeney boppers!

We had Abigail's birthday party last Saturday night.  She was beyond excited to have a party back home with old friends plus a few of her new friends from school. I had a few more pics to add to my last post of our special out of town birthday weekend, too.

The birthday girl with one of her besties, Laurel.  She and her mom came over early to help me get things together- so nice and very much appreciated!

Tons-o-fun with twister, karoake, and of course, some volleyball!

Sweet group of gals!

Blowing out candles on the famous cookie cake that stressed her momma out making!  It was worth it because she was thrilled, and it turned out tasting and looking pretty good.  I love Audrey An's face in this pic, too!

Team Volleyball found their way to the driveway to "set things up".

Medical update:
I went to the new dentist on Monday for a consultation.  I had three cracked fillings and a broken tooth!  Knowing that Dr. M  thought possibly the root of my infection might possibly be coming from my mouth I asked them how soon can we have the fixed!  Well, I went back on Tuesday and after three hours of drilling, fixing, and a hefty dental bill...I'm all fixed (at least for now as far as my mouth goes).  He made sure I understood that he was not a miracle worker and he just fixes teeth, but if I had as much decay under all those filling s that he said I did I can't help but wonder if MAYBE it's a contributing factor to my illness...bacteria creeping throughout my body from my mouth...eeek!?!?  We shall see.

Praises!
*I totally forgot to post last week that Abigail made her serve over the net in her game last week plus had several good vollies...woohoo!
* God's protection over me while coming home from dentist- flat tire along with a contact in my eye that decided to not cooperate while I'm driving!
*Abigail made a 97 on a math test today (she's been struggling and stressing over this subject)!
*Parent/teacher conference with AA's teacher today!
* Neighbors who were willing to take the girls to church on Sunday because I was wiped out from being birthday party planner momma!
*Bathroom renovation is getting closer to completion thanks to our friend, Merle, who did the drywall!  Now, we need to pick a potty, paint color and vanity (David's installing the floors right now)!

A few surprises...

Last weekend David and I had a few surprises up our sleeve for the birthday girl.  I picked up both girls early from school.  I think I scored at least a couple of cool mom points for that!  David had a long overnight in the thriving metropolis of Valdosta, Georgia so we joined him there.  I wish it had been a bit more of an exciting destination, BUT at least we had the ability to hop on a plane "just because" and be together.  I'll never complain about that!  It was a special weekend...love me some Abigail!

The birthday girl got a special ride from her favorite captain!

 She must be her momma's girls...it's nice getting love notes from her main squeeze!

HUGE surpirse...hee hee!

Medical update:
Last week I posted that I did take a couple of steps backwards.  Well, I got my labs back earlier this week, and indeed I did.  My CPK jumped back to 1285 and my hormones were (are!) completely whacked...uggh! I was really bummed about having to take that "extra" steroid pack a few weeks ago (from the other doctor) and Dr. M said it's proof that the steroids are doing me more harm than good.  She didn't need to convince me of that as you know.  She wants me to decrease my steroid again in about 4 days (hopefully I'm very close to giving them good riddance...forever!).  She also said she's not worried about the CPK right now because it was from that evil steroid pack.  When the immune system is suppressed then my infection goes wild.

She thinks now that my infection could possibly be rooted in my mouth so she's sending me to her dentist!  I have no tooth, gum or nerve pain, but she said that many people don't when they have in infection in their mouth (hmmmmmm....).  So, guess who's going to the dentist asap?!?! I can't get in until October 3.  I'm first on their cancellation list, I'm praying that I'll get in SOON and see if this has anything to do with anything! UPDATE: Since I drafted this post I got a phone call this morning saying the dentist had a cancellation for THIS Monday!  Isn't God so good!!!

Bottom line...chiropractor tells me my head isn't screwed on straight, blood work (hormone levels) tells me why I want to claw everyone's eyes out in my home, Dr. M tells me I've got enough yeast in me I could feed the 5000 (ok, she really didn't say that, but you get my drift!), but the bible tells me "Like cold water to a weary soul is good news from a distant land."  Maybe this dentist 15 miles up the highway is the distant land...lol! In all seriousness, Truth tells me that, "He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak."  I've definitely had some weary days, but I have to remember that He's brought me this far and He'll not leave me or forsake me as I trust in Him.

One last thing...took Abigail to see Dr. M today, and I'm so glad I did!  I took her all her records from Vietnam and her latest blood work from her pediatrician here.  It was a flashback to my initial appointment with her June in a few ways.  As she sifted through past records she said, "There are some significant markers that indicate INFECTION.  No wonder she is so tied and doesn't feel good."  My poor baby hasn't felt well for a long time either (no energy, etc) and she's not been treated for it....arrrgh! I'm praying for accurate new test results and wisdom for the doc (for both of us!).  We'll follow up  in about 3 weeks and see where we are on things with Abigail.

I'm thinking it's not a real great thing when your pharmacist sees you walk in and doesn't even have to ask your name...just sayin'!!!  Okay, off to get some sleep. Please pray for extra strength this weekend as we have Abigail's birthday party.  Thankfully, I've got a sweet friend to come give me two extra hands at the party.  Abigail is SO excited...new friends, old friends, karaoke, pizza- a lot of squeeling tweens!

On a side note...I was listening to a podcast of Beth Moore this morning.  I loved this quote: "God is just as deliberate about what He does not reveal as He is about what He does. "I'd be lying if I didn't wonder why God is choosing not to heal me (my daughter) at this time.  There is a reason.  I choose to trust Him.

Snap, crackle....

POP...and I'm not talking Rice Krispies.  Well, I went to the chiropractor for the first time last week.  I've always been a bit freaked out by them, but I do have several friends who go to one regularly and promise they couldn't live without their chiropractor!  I figured Dr. M would soon be recommending me go since she offices with one...it was just a matter of time.  So, I put my big girl pants on and went for a consult like she recommended. This doctor does NOT do any "snap, crackle, pop" (or I'd been running out out of there so fast!).  She uses the Atlas Orthogonal method which is a specialized method in chiropractic practices.  Well, what do ya know, after pre-adjustment x-rays...I have a severe neck injury.  Who would've thunk it!?!  Long story short...honestly, does this surprise me!?!?  What's one more issue, ya know ;-)  I was in a bad car accident back in high school and had lots of sports injuries so I guess all of that balled up made one nice neck misalignment for her to treat.  I'm grateful though.  Maybe this is just one more piece of my puzzle that God continues to reveal to me.  Dr. D (the chiropractor) is extremely nice, gentle and puts up with all my questions!!  She even called me at home to check on me the next day!  After one adjustment in my neck my left leg "dropped" an inch (back to where it should be).  After trying to educate myself and listening to her explanations, it really all does make perfect sense how being misaligned can cause a host of issues.  When one's spine and neck aren't aligned properly it inhibits the central nervous system to work properly.  Now I know my head has never really been screwed on straight...lol!!!

As many of you know the past few weeks have been less than stellar for me healthwise.  To quote Dr. M yesterday, "Well, we've had a little set back.  Sometimes healing in one's body takes one step forward and two steps back." Dr. M took blood work again so hopefully I'll find out those results at my appointment next week.  She changed up some meds again, gave me 6 infusions, and I went to the chiropractor again all in one day.  I'll be going twice a week for at least 5 more weeks to the chiropractor since I'm in what she calls "intensive care".  I AM GOING TO RISE ABOVE THIS!!!  "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength!"  Phil. 4:13  Of course, the steps backwards begin to take a toll on anyone mentally...me included.  Thanks goodness I have hope in the Lord or I don't know how I'd handle any of this (or life!).  Praise God that He's so patient with me because I'm not always very patient in His timing and His choice of how and when to work in my life.  I must remember that "His Ways are not our [my] ways!"

On a lighter note...  Abigail came home from volleyball practice last night jumping up and down with excitement!  God's timing is so wonderful, ya know (ok, I need to read that again!  God's timing in wonderful.  There. I said it again.).  She made TEN serves in a row during practice...woo hoo!!!!!  The coach told the girls they had to complete ten in a row before she would let them start practicing overhand serves.  Abs was 1 of 3 on her team who could do it.  This was a HUGE confidence booster for her and SUCH a tangible way for her to see God working in her life.  We've been praying, and she's been practicing with her daddy. PRAYER. POWER. PERSEVERANCE!!!!  She even said during P.E. they played volleyball and she kept serving them over and over and everyone was clapping.  She said, "mom, it got kind of embarassing with everyone cheering!"  HAHA...now THAT'S what I call an "above and beyond more than we can ever imagine" answered prayer!  Now, let's transfer this success to her game on Monday and she'll been super duper stoked!

Praises!
* Abigail's volleyball success!
* Audrey An's teacher set her up with a reading tutor!
*We've just hired a friend to help David do the drywall in our guest bath!
*Dr. M readjusted some meds to get me back on track!
*I finished that "extra" steroid dose pack so sleep is slowly improving!